Beer, Porn, Business Cards and Technology

Just another day in Tokyo.

My lack of updates has been noted. I’ve been busy, OK?!

Here are my thoughts on Japan lately:

1. I LOVE Japanese “Washlettes” (the hi-tech toilets). I think I’m now addicted to them. I can’t use one- anywhere- without trying all of the buttons out. And as I’ve just now found out, after a long day full of meetings and a few hours in Akihabara (“Electric City” ie the Tottenham Ct Rd of Tokyo) there’s nothing better than a go on the Washlette.

2. I will not rest until Virgin train staff in the UK bow when they enter and leave a carriage. I Will. Not. Rest.

3. The Japanese, the English (not the British) and the Germans were all separated at birth.
Japanese- love drinking
Germans- love drinking
English- really love drinking
English- weird sexual perverts
Germans- weird sexual perverts
Japanese- very weird sexual perverts
Japanese- like to think they are superior to everyone else
English- like to think they are superior to everyone else
Germans- really like to think they are superior to everyone else

The Japanese give the Germans a good run for their money when it comes to efficiency. One could probably literally set one’s watch by the trains here.

The Japanese, like the English (proper English, not the screwed up thing that’s happened lately with the Nanny State crap) are so polite that it verges on rudeness. They also share the worship of tea and the love of immaculately manicured gardens, as well.

4. Only 1% of Japan is Christian. The rest are Buddhist or Shinto. We haven’t seen one whacked out, annoying or messed-up dickhead and there is virtually no crime here at all.. Work it out for yourself.

5. I never knew squid could melt in your mouth.

6. Tokyo is a perfect city.
Yeah, yeah, I’m sure if I lived here I’d find its faults, but I’ve been many places around the world where I’ve thought, ‘Nope. I never want to go back there again.’ But not Tokyo…It’s Blade Runner, it’s Coruscant, it’s *exactly* how we will be living in about 20 years’ time… as long as we don’t let the religious whackos ruin it all for us.

OK… It’s late. As I mentioned I had meetings today and then spent a few hours in “Electric City” looking for a good deal… I bought a Sanyo Xacti DMX-C6 (the Japanese model, not the UK/US VPC model. I got the red one) and a 1GB SD card for £150 less than the camera alone sells in the UK. I honestly wasn’t expecting to find cheap cool tech here… I’m about to scream with joy.

So, I’ve got to go so I can plug it in and fawn over it as it charges.

Comments
7 Responses to “Beer, Porn, Business Cards and Technology”
  1. Phoenix says:

    you almost make me want to go to japan… almost.
    you’d probably be able to convince me if i hadn’t been reading this for a while.

  2. R.J. says:

    ‘Oo yer callin’ a weird sexual pervert, then?

  3. Tom says:

    If you can get them to bring the trains as well as the overly polite conductors, that’d be lovely. The Japanese know how to do public transport right: It’s efficient, cheap and certainly in the case of the Shinkansen, REALLY FUCKING FAST.

    Of course this is just the opinion of a culturally aloof, alcoholic, tea-craving, sex pervert so meh.

  4. McBee says:

    http://timesonline.typepad.com/times_tokyo_weblog/

    Clean bottoms – what price?

    Few Japanese innovations have brought more pleasure, as well as convenience, than the Washlet – the high-tech toilet that warms, spray-cleans and dries the bottom, as well as disposing of its waste products. “Even your bottom can be beautiful,” the Washlet’s advertising slogan goes. “Your bottom will like it after only three tries.”

    But now chastening news. The soothing Washlet, it turns out, is the cloacal equivalent of a Humvee – a wasteful, energy-guzzling enemy of the earth.

    The revelation comes in an important op-ed piece in this morning’s Daily Yomiuri by Professor Masaharu Asaba, entitled ‘High-tech toilets stir environmental concerns’. “Many users admit they become “addicted” once they try electric toilets,” the professor writes. “But the toilets … are the thirstiest water guzzlers in the home, responsible for 28 percent of average household water consumption. We can no longer afford to turn a blind eye to the volume of resources they require.”

    Apart from this important information, the piece also earns my nomination for the year’s finest mixed metaphor. “Toilets,” Professor Asaba observes, “have been a vital cog in the makeup of this country …”

    Picture, if you can, the graceful turning of that cosmetic toilet cog …

    Continue reading “Bad news for bottoms” »

    Posted by Richard Lloyd Parry on April 21, 2006 at 11:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBack (1)

  5. giagia says:

    I agree. But I don’t think that Japan generally is a very eco-friendly country. Despite that fact Tokyo is the cleanest big city I have ever seen. I don’t think I saw one scrap of litter the whole time. In fact in the Metro a woman accidentally dropped a newspaper as she was rushing to the train and two businessmen were literally stopped in their tracks by this. They stopped and stared at the newspaper for a few seconds, then the woman realised what had happened and returned to apologetically pick it up.

    The UK is a pig sty.

  6. Two Left Feet says:

    Sweetheart did it ever occur to you that YOU are turning into a religious wacko?!?!?!

  7. giagia says:

    Interesting, “sweetheart”, how exactly do you figure that?